英語搞笑小故事3分鐘

　　笑話一般比較短小,喜劇性很強(qiáng),普遍存在于人們的日常生活中。笑話的娛樂作用可以減輕人的心理壓力,促進(jìn)身體健康。小編精心收集了3分鐘英語搞笑小故事，供大家欣賞學(xué)習(xí)!

　　Three competing store owners rented adjoining shops in a mall.Observers waited for mayhem to ensue.

　　三個(gè)互相爭(zhēng)生意的商店老板在一條商業(yè)街上租用了毗鄰的店鋪。旁觀者等著瞧好戲。

　　The retailer on the right put up huge signs saying, "Gigantic Sale!" and "Super Bargains!"

　　右邊的零售商掛起了巨大的招牌，上書：“大減價(jià)!”“特便宜!”

　　The store on the left raised bigger signs proclaiming, "Prices Slashed!" and "Fantastic Discounts!"

　　左邊的商店掛出了更大的招牌，聲稱：“大砍價(jià)!”“大折扣!”

　　The owner in the middle then prepared a large sign that simply stated, "ENTRANCE".

　　中間的商人隨后準(zhǔn)備了一個(gè)大招牌，上面只簡單地寫著：“入口處”。

　　A friend of mine who teachs European history at Washington University in St. Louis tell aboutthe time he spotted a plagiarized term paper. He summoned the student to his office. "This isn'tyour work." he said. "Someone typed it for you straight out of the encyclopedia. "You cann'tprove that!" the student sputtered. My friend amiled and show him the paper. Circled in redwas: "Also see article on communism."

　　我有個(gè)朋友在圣路易斯的華盛頓大學(xué)教歐洲歷史，他說有一次他發(fā)現(xiàn)了一篇抄襲的學(xué)期論文。他把那個(gè)學(xué)生叫到了辦公室。“這不是你寫的，”他說，“有人幫你從百科全書上原封不動(dòng)地打印了下來。” “你沒有證據(jù)。”那學(xué)生氣急敗壞地說。 我朋友笑了，他把論文拿給他看。用紅筆圈出來的是：“也可參閱共產(chǎn)主義一文。”

　　Jack Hawkins was the football coach at an Amercian college, and he was always trying to find good players, but they weren‘t always smart enought to be accepted by the college.

　　One day the coach brought an excellent young player to the dean of the college and asked that the student be allowed to enter without an examination. "Well," the dean said after(repost是什么梗？repost的意思是“轉(zhuǎn)發(fā)”，有的人系統(tǒng)設(shè)置是英文的，語言隨系統(tǒng)也會(huì)變成英文，轉(zhuǎn)發(fā)微博以后就會(huì)看見“repost”。后來網(wǎng)友們?cè)谵D(zhuǎn)發(fā)內(nèi)容時(shí)，也會(huì)手動(dòng)標(biāo)注“repost”表明為轉(zhuǎn)發(fā)。) some persuasion, "I‘d better ask him a few questions first."

　　Then he turned to the student and asked him some very easy questions, but the student didn‘t know any of the answers.

　　At last the dean said, "Well, what‘s five times seven?"

　　The student thought for a long time and then answered, "Thirty-six."

　　The dean threw up his hands and looked at the coach in despair, but the coach said earnestly, "Oh, please let him in, sir! He was only wrong by two."

　　杰克霍金斯是美國一所學(xué)院的橄欖球隊(duì)教練，他竭力想物色好球員。但是好球員學(xué)業(yè)不行，院方不愿錄取。

　　有一天，教練帶著一位優(yōu)秀的年輕球員去見院長，希望院方同意他免試入學(xué)。經(jīng)過一番勸說后院長說：“那我最好先問問他幾個(gè)問題。”

　　然后他轉(zhuǎn)向?qū)W生，問了幾個(gè)非常簡單的問題?？墒悄莻€(gè)學(xué)生一個(gè)也答不上來。

　　最后院長說：“那么，五乘七得多少?”

　　學(xué)生想了很久，然后回答說：“三十六。”

　　院長攤開雙手失望地看了看教練?？墒墙叹氄J(rèn)真地說，“噢，錄取他吧，先生。他的答案只比正確答案多二。”

　　
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